


The Five Times Steve Called Tony an Idiot

by rocknrollout



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Deaf Clint Barton, Fluff, Hurt Tony, M/M, Minor Violence, Protective Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-23
Updated: 2014-10-23
Packaged: 2018-02-22 06:15:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2497595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocknrollout/pseuds/rocknrollout
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>and the one time Tony said it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Five Times Steve Called Tony an Idiot

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Stony Idiot Meme](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/79790) by Krusca. 



 

**While Smiling**

Steve sat comfortably on the overly plush sofa in Avenger’s Tower, with his sketchpad open on his lap. A poor drawing of the New York skyline was glaring up at him, mocking him. He just couldn't get the modern buildings right. Well, If he was looking right at them, then sure; he could focus on the shape and maybe it’d turn into something he was satisfied with. Right now, though, he wasn't looking at anything besides the pencil in his hand, and his memory liked the forties more.

For the past hour, Steve had been blissfully alone. Thor was in Asgard, for some celebration the demi-god hadn’t released much information about. Except that he’d be gone for “one fortnight, comrades!” Clint and Natasha were on a “business trip” they weren't allowed to talk about. Bruce and Tony were the only ones in the Tower, both in their respective labs. Steve knew that Bruce wouldn't spend so much time working that he’d keel over. The other resident genius was a completely different story.

He’d have to go check on him soon.

Steve looked back down at the paper, scowling. It wasn’t even close to meeting the expectations he’d set for himself. He was better than this. Flipping to a fresh page, he tried again, picturing the strict lines of the skyscrapers. After a while, it was starting to turn out how he wanted, and Steve had begun smiling as he drew.

The door to the elevator opened without Steve’s knowledge, the man so absorbed in his work that he missed the resounding _Ding!_

That’s why, when Tony was suddenly sitting next to him, Steve almost jumped off the couch.

“What—” Steve shouted (no, Tony, he did not squeal. It was manly), sketchpad dropped to the ground as he almost fell over the arm of the couch.

Tony somehow grabbed the front of his shirt and dragged him back over. “Whoa there, Capsicle didn’t mean to scare you. If I’d know you were so jumpy—”

“You didn’t scare me,” Steve defended, once he was calm. He glanced around him, reaching down to grab his sketchbook once he spotted it, lying open upside down. He closed it and looked at Tony. The genius billionaire had stretched himself on the other side of the couch. His ankle was resting on his knee and arm draped over the sofa back. He held his cell phone in his left hand, staring at Steve. “Do you need anything?”

Tony shook his head, not as an answer but more to clear his thoughts, as if he’d been zoning out. “Yeah, I need twenty bucks.”

“Um…” Steve trailed off. He tilted his head just enough to express his confusion without making himself look like a lost puppy. “Last time I checked, you’re the billionaire.”

“Not from you,” Tony laughed, dropping his foot to the floor and scooting closer to Steve. “I made a bet with Rhodey.” He was now sitting right next to Steve, their shoulders touching. He held his phone out in front of them and wrapped the other arm around Steve’s shoulder. “Now, smile!”

Steve stared at Tony confused, who was smiling up at his phone when he heard a soft click!

Tony pulled the phone back down, glaring at it. “Dammit, Cap, you were supposed to smile. Take two!”

“Why are we posing for a picture?” Steve asked when Tony tried again. He still didn’t smile, too distracted by his need for reasoning.

“Because Rhodey bet that I couldn’t get you to take a selfie with me,” Tony said with an absent mind, as he fiddled with his phone for a second. “Ok, third time's the charm! Smile!”

“You’re an idiot,” Steve joked but complied with the order. He wrapped an arm around Tony’s shoulder and smiled up at the camera.

**While Being Stupid**

“Tony, this doesn’t seem like a good idea,” Steve muttered from his place leaning against one of the worktables in Tony’s lab. His crossed his arms tensely over his chest. Tony had invited him to witness “the best repulsors yet” first test. The only reason was because he always gave Tony crap for testing his tech without safety for himself and others in mind. The genius probably thought that being there would stop his nagging. He was wrong.

“It’s fine,” Tony assured dismissively, as he snapped the last buckle on the left-hand gauntlet. He almost ignored the motorcycle helmet that Steve had thrown at him when he first entered the workshop until the super soldier coughed accusingly. With an exaggerated sigh, he picked up Steve’s helmet and buckled it on his head. “Happy?”

“Not in the slightest,” Steve said, one corner of his lip twitching, the barest hint of sarcasm on his tongue.

Tony flashed the super-soldier a trademark grin and began the process of turning on the gauntlets. If his calculations were correct, then this would increase the power in them just enough to let him fly without the boots. He still wasn’t sure when such a thing would be necessary, but, you know, better safe than sorry. Right?

“Ok, starting at 5% power,” he muttered more to himself, than Steve or the video camera You was holding. He angled his hands palms-down, the thumbs extended at a ninety-degree angle towards the floor. This was a new technique, to let him increase and decrease power just by the angle of his thumbs. When they pointed down they were completely off, and as he slowly raised them to be parallel with the rest of his hand, they climbed in power. It should let him focus JARVIS on other things, and allow different amounts of power for each gauntlet at the same time.

The gauntlets activated at the perfect pace, lifting him from the floor by only a few inches. They held the position for 30 seconds when Tony began to increase the power.

6%...7%...8%...9%...10%...

He began to gain height little by little, all his focus on his thumbs. He had almost forgotten about Steve, who was still leaning against the table, brooding silently. Tony’s mind began to wander a bit because now he was thinking about how much energy this took. Ok, so maybe it wasn’t such a great idea to put all control of his flight power in his thumbs.

11%...12%...13%........

While Tony was pondering the problems with having to give this his full attention, he pulled his thumbs up too quickly. His left gauntlet rushed to 58% and the right at 53%. The sudden increase in power shot him up into the ceiling at a crooked angle. He pierced through and hung there for a moment by the edges of his helmet.

“You idiot!” Steve screamed, trying for anger but his worry bled through.

It didn’t take long for Tony to fall back down. The plaster that had been holding him in place crumbling from the weight. He dropped with a shout, knowing the height of the workshop; 20 feet, exactly. This fall was going to hurt worse than slamming head first into the ceiling.

Tony clenched his eyes shut as he fell, until he landed on...not the floor. Steve had caught him as he was falling and now they both were laying in a heap on the floor. Steve's had his arms wrapped around Tony’s waist, holding the smaller man against his chest.

It took them both a minute to figure out what had happened. Even when they had a perfect understanding of the situation, neither tried to move.

Tony moaned, holding his aching head in his hands. “At least I wore my helmet,” he groaned with a light chuckle, before going limp in Steve’s arms.

**While Seriously Pissed**

Steve and Tony were friends, maybe even the closest friend each other had. For some reason, this meant they argued, _a lot_. Most of the time, it was out of concern, both swearing up and down that the other took too many risks.

It was true on both fronts.

Today’s offense was actually pretty minor. During a mission, where some giant tentacle monster was about to take a swipe at Steve, Tony pushed him out of the way. Since he was inside the armor, Tony had only gotten the wind knocked out of him, but Steve wholeheartedly refused to drop the subject.

“You could have been killed!” Steve yelled in Tony’s face, both of them standing in the middle of the common room. Steve was still in his uniform, coated in blood, dirt and sweat; Tony was out of the armor, but still in his skin-tight undersuit.

“I was saving you!”

“That doesn’t mean you throw yourself in front of a giant tentacle going 20 miles an hour!”

Tony wasn’t about to correct Steve, and tell him that the tentacles were _actually_ moving at around 40 mph. He instead snapped back, “If you didn’t notice, the armor was barely damaged,” he stated defensively. He glared up at the taller man, “and _I’m fine!_ ”

The other Avengers, minus Bruce, were watching the two go at it, wondering when they’d just admit that they loved each other. Seriously, this was starting to get ridiculous. There may even be a bet going around on who would admit it first.

Not wanting to disrupt the "not-a-couple’s" bickering, Clint caught Natasha’s eye and started signing to her. _Think we’ll have to deal with this if they ever start fucking?_ He asked.

 _With our luck, it will be worse._ Natasha replied, in ASL. She had already know sign language long before she met Clint. When she learned that her teammate and best friend was 60% deaf, she had decided to relearn the language. Yeah, he had hearing aids, but they still liked to have the ability in case it was ever needed. Like right now.

_God, it better not be._

“What if, next time you try something like that, it fails and you get hurt?” Steve asked, taking a deep breath to settle his racing mind. He cared about Tony, a lot, and the thought of him hurt....

Tony rolled his eyes, and crossed his arms across his chest. “Why are you getting so worked up about this anyways? I’m a big boy and I can handle myself.”

“Because I love you, you idiot!” Steve said before his brain had processed anything.

Tony stared at Steve with no expression for a moment, having not expected a reply at all, and definitely not that. His face turned a light shade of red, as he muttered. “Well...good...because I... care about you too.”

“Oh, would you two just kiss already?” Clint yelled from his spot on the back of the couch, ignoring the death-glares he got.

**While Blushing**

“Hey, Shellhead,” Steve murmured in Tony’s ear, wrapping his arms around his waist from behind. He ran gentle kisses along the back and side of Tony’s neck, making the genius squirm in his grip.

“Need something, Capsicle?” Tony asked, his voice strained as he pointedly ignored the ministrations.

“Do I need a reason to come see my boyfriend?”

They had started dating a few months ago. Everything was going a lot smoother than their lives had been when they were denying their feelings for one another. Other than the fact that they now fuck, cuddle and all that other couple stuff, nothing had changed. Tony still spent too much time in his workshop, until Steve had to convince him to go to bed (a lot easier than it used to be). If Steve wasn’t worrying about his boyfriend keeling over, he was either drawing, on a mission for Shield, or working out. Somehow, they’d started arguing more, but not about anything serious. It always ended with really good make-up sex too.

“When he’s working…on…highly…sensitive…stooop!” Tony said between Steve’s kisses along his neck. They felt good, too good; he has work and this is distracting.

“Oh, am I in the way?” Steve asked innocently, continuing no matter Tony’s protests. He placed his hands on the base of Tony’s hips, and spun him around. Their pelvises pressed together, as Steve began sucking a hickey on Tony’s collarbone.

Tony gasped, and grabbed a fistful of Steve’s hair. Steve knew exactly what to do to make Tony turn into a puddle. Steve pressed him against the metal workbench, and the not-so-smooth edge dug into his ass. He didn’t care, even though he winced when Steve pushed him against it again.

With little effort, Steve hefted Tony into the air and placed him on the bench. He knocked over the metal-something Tony had been working on before. It gave him easier access to the shorter man’s beautiful, slightly-chapped lips. “Gorgeous…absolutely stunning…and smart… and kind…” he said between kisses.

A light blush appeared on Tony’s cheeks as Steve continued to compliment him. He still wasn’t used to Steve’s constant praise. In the morning, when Steve accidentally woke Tony up as he got up to go on his run, he’ll lean over the half-asleep man and whisper in his ear, “Go back to sleep, handsome. I’ll see you for breakfast.” At breakfast, while Steve scarfs down 3 pounds of protein and Tony cradles a coffee mug like it was his first born, Steve will usually comment on how cute Tony looks with bedhead, or something equally cheesy. It would continue throughout the day, until they were in bed together, with Steve kissing a trail of compliments up Tony’s chest.

Steve moved away from his boyfriend for a moment, with a wide and cheeky grin on his perfect face. “You’re blushing...”

He said it with such love that Tony couldn’t be mad, even when Steve started chuckling. “Stevie, why did the love stop?” He asked with an exaggerated pout, trying to divert Steve’s attention away from the rose covering his face.

“You’re really cute when you’re an idiot,” Steve commented, pressing his lips against Tony’s.

 

**While Crying**

“Iron Man!” Captain America shouted, the words biting through his tongue. He watched, helpless, as his teammate disappeared beneath a crumbling building. The battle around him forgotten, Captain America ran towards the rubble. the ash and concrete bits in the air burned his throat but he wouldn’t wait for it to settle. “Iron Man is down,” he said over the comm-link, his voice tense and nervous.

Only Thor had seen the building go down, having been in the sky at the time. The demi-god landed next to his captain, Mjolnir in hand. He looked at Steve, and surveyed the rubble. He couldn’t see any red and gold armor among the concrete and steel.

“Iron Man, respond,” Captain America ordered roughly through his comm-link; there was only static. JARVIS didn’t answer either.

Without warning, Thor’s hand was on Captain America’s shoulder. If he was a different man, with a calmer past, Steve might have jumped. Instead, he took a deep breathe as he looked at Thor.

“I will rescue our fallen comrade, Captain,” Thor said. “Continue leading our team to victory.”

Captain America nodded. With slight hesitance, he turned away and charged the first thing he saw. It was a drone; one of Hydra's, with four thin, spider-like legs. A hit from his shield to the joints would immobilize it. With a grunt, he swung his shield at the thing with more force than he needed. It went through the leg, bouncing off the wall of a building and flying back to its owner.

The drone collapsed, useless.

Another drone began to approach, cannon firing small bursts of a green energy. Dodging the shots, Steve ran forward, shield outstretched, and got ready to throw. This time, he aimed for the cannon. Throwing his shield at the perfect angle, it hit the side of the cannon. It didn't go through completely, but rendered it useless.

Steve jumped and landed on top of the drone, yanking his shield out from its wiring. Before he could finish it off, Thor was yelling his name. He looked towards where he’d left the demi-god, and saw the large man kneeling over a dented, broken suit of red and gold armor.

“Tony,” Steve breathed, ending the drone with one clean hit to the head and jumping off; he sprinted towards his teammates.

He dropped to his knees next to the Iron Man armor. There were massive dents along the chest piece and down both legs and arms. The left leg had worrying amounts of blood pouring from its seams and fractures. The helmet seemed relatively undamaged, besides the stripped paint and a crack down the cheek.

With a move he knew Tony loathed, Steve ripped off the faceplate and tossed it aside.

Tony’s eyes were closed, lips parted as he breathed in short gasps. Steve choked on his breath when he noticed that there was a large trail of blood from his cheek to his chin, where the cracked armor cut into him.

“Thor, help finish this battle,” Steve ordered, leaving no room for argument. If the other man noticed the crack in Steve’s voice, he didn’t mention it.

The demi-god nodded, and with a short burst of wind, was back to fighting with the Avengers.

Steve took a slow, shaking breath and gathered Tony into his arms. “Come on, Tony, you have to wake up, okay?” He whispered.

Medical help wouldn’t be able to reach them because of the damage to the city, and Steve couldn’t move Tony until the area was clear. Which meant the Avengers had to win this battle, now.

“Cap, how is he?” Clint asked over the comm-link.

“The armor’s down,” Steve said coldly; he had to remain calm. “Iron Man needs immediate medical attention.”

“Keep him alive. We’re almost done here,” Natasha said.

“Hurry,” Steve said, closing the link.

He looked back down at Tony; he didn’t look good. His face was pale and a thin sheen of sweat was covering his forehead. The cut on his face had begun to clot, but when Steve looked down at his leg, he could tell it was still flowing freely.

“Please, Tony, just stay with me a little longer....” he paused, forcing the panic down. “I need you to wake up an-and laugh at me for being stupid and emotional,” Steve began to ramble, unsure of what to do. He only had a limited amount of medical knowledge. He leaned forward to press his forehead against Tony’s. “...Please... ”

He could feel something warm mixing with his tears, and knew it was Tony’s blood.

The breathing against his cheek began to disappear, intervals between each breath becoming longer. “No, no no, no, no, no…” Steve said, his voice hoarse and broken. “You can’t leave me like this, you idiot.” He pressed his lips to Tony’s, plugging the man’s nose and tipping his chin back as far as the armor would allow. He blew into Tony’s mouth for one second, willing the man to stay alive for just a little bit longer.

 

**While Recovering**

The smell of hospitals made Steve sick to his stomach; they always had. Maybe it was because of how much time he spent in hospitals as a kid. Probably not though, because he now had a more relevant reason to hate them.

How often he spent time in the visitors chair.

Steve wasn’t in his uniform anymore, because Natasha had made him take a shower and change a few hours ago. She’d pushed him into the Shield showers while Tony was in surgery, and handed him a cotton shirt and pair of jeans when he got out.

Now, he was sitting next to Tony’s hospital bed, watching the unconscious man’s chest rise and fall. The heart monitor was the only sound in the room. There had been an oxygen mask on his face when they’d brought him in, but now he just had the standard nasal cannula. The doctor spent three hours trying to save his life in an operating theater. Tony now had screws holding together his tibia and fibula (the weight of the building had crushed them); there were five stitches along the back of his head, and he was finally in a stable condition.

Tony’s doctor said that he would probably sleep through the night, his body needing as much rest as possible to heal. Steve was willing to wait as long as he had to, if that meant Tony would live through this.

It was eleven at night, and Steve was starting to feel the day weight down on him. They’d started fighting Hydra at around five or six in the morning; Steve couldn’t remember exactly right now. Tony had complained about villains needing better schedules as they were all suiting up.

The other Avengers had gone back to the Tower for some rest an hour ago, after Steve promised to keep them updated. Before they’d left, Natasha had promised that they’d be back first thing next morning. The others had nodded in agreement as they walked out the door.

It seemed that the longer Steve fought to keep his eyes open, the more intense his exhaustion became. Soon, he was lying his folded arms on the bed, head resting on top of them. His eyes felt heavy, and Steve knew that he should just give in and go to sleep. It’d be better if he would just rest, and didn’t look worse than Tony when the other man finally woke up.

Steve fell asleep.

 

About six hours later, he woke up. He could feel something lightly poking his nose. With a tired moan he cracked his eyes open, trying to find the evil thing that woke him up. His eyesight was blurry from dryness, but he could tell that there was a thin finger in his face.

“Ugh,” he mumbled into his still folded arms.

“Hey, Idiot...” Tony said soft and sweet, with a hint of amusement. “Your neck hurt?”

Steve groaned again, barely comprehending what Tony had said to him. He was still tired. He rubbed along the back of his neck, feeling a tight painful knot.

“Want to wake up?”

“Noooo,” Steve moaned, ducking his head back against his arms.

He heard a tired chuckle above him, as fingers began to run through his hair. Finally, his brain started to actually process what was happening. He looked back up, and saw his boyfriend smiling at him. “You’re awake,” he mumbled.

“Yep,” Tony said, still running his fingers through Steve’s messy hair.

Steve sat up, and stretched painfully. His back, shoulders and neck really wanted him to know that he should not sleep hunched over, right after a battle, ever again. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore; my leg’s killing me though,” Tony said. He wiggled his nose from side to side, the nubbins of the cannula tickling him. “God, I hate these,” he complained, moving to take it out until Steve stopped him.

“You will keep that in until your Doctor says otherwise,” Steve ordered, pulling Tony’s arms away. He held both of the genius’s hands between his, and leaned forward to give him a kiss.

“So, how bad is it?” Tony asked after they’d stopped.

“The Doctor can tell you better than I can, but I do know that you’ll be out of the field for at least three months, probably more.”

“You’re kidding,” Tony said with no humor in his voice.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, but your left leg's shattered and you needed screws to put it back together. You’re going to be off your feet for a while.”

Tony threw his head back against the pillow, whining, “But Steeeeve. The world needs me.”

“This really isn’t up for argument,” Steve said, sighing. “You’re going to rest and I’m going to take care of you.”

“Hate you so much,” Tony muttered irritably with no real venom. He crossed his arms over his chest, mindful of the IV still in his hand.

“I love you too, Shellhead,”Steve grinned, giving Tony another kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first Avengers Fanfiction, so feedback on how in-character everyone was is greatly appreciated.


End file.
